Confessions Of A Bad Fashion Blogger
Firstly, can I start by saying that I most definitely did not intend to have as much boob on show in these photos as I do but hey, I'm gonna roll with it and pretend like I'm a totally strong and empowered woman that doesn't give a shit. In reality, I've been staring at these pictures for the last 10 days now and have finally urged myself to use them for a comeback post after 2 weeks away from the blog, with the help of one ...or two... glasses of wine (last night). Why am I telling you this? Because I have something to get off my chest....
Hi, my name is Elvira and I'm a BAD FASHION BLOGGER. There I said it!
What does that mean? Well, a number of things really, of which I'm gonna break down for you in this ridiculously long post. Brace yourself!
So, the other day, I was asked to complete a survey for a university student doing her dissertation on blogging and I was stopped in my tracks by the following question: what makes you and your blog different? Fuck me, I was stumped. After 2 years of blogging, I'd never given that much thought. Stupid really, but I guess I was kinda just ambling along with my blog. This time, I tried really hard to think deeply about it but I had nada. Because ultimately, there isn't much that makes me different (I'm really selling my blog here right?). I mean, how could there be when as of 2013, there were over 152 million blogs out there. At this point, everyone and their mothers have a blog so how do I stand out? I think I wrote something about my love for sharing stories whether through my writing or through my photos (which I try to keep more interesting than standing in front of a white wall). But the god honest truth is that I am a really lazy fashion blogger; a blogger caught somewhere in the middle of those who have given up after a few months of blogging (I don't blame you honey) and those who dedicate their lives to their blogs.
So there are a number of reasons I consider myself a lazy blogger; 5 infact:
1. Time is of the essence
I started my blog when I was unemployed so had unlimited hours to dedicate into pouring myself over every detail of it. Also, I literally had nothing else to do (I watched enough Jeremy Kyle to scar me for life) so I was excited to throw myself into a new project or rather ANY project. Now I have a full time job, a demanding one to say the least, where I am dealing with people's mental and social issues and I come home every day drained. By the time, I've cooked dinner, tidied up, organized my life for the next day, checked in with my family, boyfriend or friends, forgive me if I'm not jumping for joy to blog about anything, let alone the latest culotte trend. Thus, I tend to lack consistency in my posting but I just don't have the stamina anymore to stay up til 1 am in order to get a post done.
2. Trends are meh
On the culotte topic, I really am not that fussed about fashion. Shocking, I know, especially for a self- professed fashion blogger. My issue is that I like clothes but only clothes that make me look good with very minimal effort (see, lazy as it comes). So I'm not particularly driven by fashion. I stay away from trends cos I hate hype. I don't like to do things that others are doing when they are doing it, which means I'm normally behind (or sometimes super early). Occasionally my like of clothes may coincide with a fashion trend but that's mostly pure luck. I mean, I have called "culottes" cutlets for the last year, so I really have no idea what I'm talking about. Which is as real as it gets because honestly, my fashion/style/whatever isn't anything to write home about (again, doing a wonderful job of selling my blog!). I don't think I dress bad but neither am I teaching Vogue a thing or two.
3. Overthinking is a killer
If you haven't guessed already, I'm an overthinker. I work in a field where I'm required to analyze every and all angles and while I thought I had it under control, I've recently noticed that I may be losing my mind. I over analyze everything, to the point that I cannot make decisions. I kid you not. I called my best friend not long ago to ask whether she thought I should get a wax midweek for convenience or weekend for effectiveness. Who does that? I spend ages deliberating both sides of EVERY situation. It's exhausting and I'm kinda starting to get a little sick of my own head. And naturally, this applies to my blog e.g. what is even the point? do I still enjoy it? do I want to be successful at blogging or just do it for a hobby? why don't my pictures look like everyone else's? and so on and so on. I've almost forgotten why I even started blogging in the first place. And don't get me started on editing photos and posting on Instagram. I'm so sick and tired of looking at pictures of myself. The taking of a million photos that are ever so slightly different yet really all the same. The criticizing of every angle and trying to filter and edit out all imperfections. The relentless negative thinking that has its roots in comparing myself to these sunkissed Insta glamazons at freaking Coachella, making me feel inadequate. By the time I've plucked enough confidence and motivation to do a blog post, I'm so bogged down with all these thoughts going round my head that I can't be bothered anymore.
Blogging takes a lot of time, like more than you realize. Even when I'm not blogging, I'm thinking about it. What my next post is gonna be, when can I schedule a shoot, who is gonna take my pictures? That's before I even touch my computer to edit, write or post. And so a lot of prioritizing has to take place but unfortunately I'm not willing to compromise that much. When I have the time to blog, I will, but I'm not about letting it dictate my movements day to day. Everyone is different and I know bloggers who are willing to skip cinema trips with their friends to stay in all weekend and prep their blogs but that's just not me. I guess that's why they are more successful than I am haha.
5. Networking nightmare
I'm terrible at networking. I truly am. I shy away from events, reply late to emails, take weeks to draft a product endorsement post. And good God, I hate thinking about new apps or searching tips that will help me with some small aspect of my site or social media. I don't have the attention span or patience for it! Plus, I dread promoting my blog in ways that make me look, what I perceive as "begging for followers" e.g. posting on other's pages plugging my blog. I do it sometimes but not that much cos I just feel lame. I'm also quite reserved so struggle to lay it all out there, so to speak, and engage so openly with cyberspace. This is not to put potential future collaborators off because when I get a post done I do a pretty good job but yeh I know, I need to work on it. This industry is about being shameless around self-promotion but I have too much pride for that. Living in the UK, I've really taken hold of this self-deprecation thing they've got going on here. The Nigerian in me is so ashamed.
And so, with that realization and my mind on overkill, I decided to have a short break from the blog. With it being a 24/7 thing, there's no such thing as annual leave but I needed it so I created it. I took time to decide if it was something I wanted to continue, whether it was still making me happy or just bringing me down and then I just stopped thinking about it at all. Bliss! Best timing ever cos my mum made a surprise visit to London and I got to spend much needed quality time with her. She reminded me life is short so I should enjoy the ride and not to get so worked up about the little things. She fed me (home-cooked rice, stew and oxtail is the one, yeh buddy!), clothed me (when mum buys you shoes - can I get a hallelujah!) and made me laugh! And lo and behold, I'm ready to try this blogging thing again. Who knows, maybe it's not about changing my blogging style but embracing it. Maybe my niche is about being a lazy fashion blogger and highlighting outfits that work with the smallest effort needed. Literally minuscule. Like, don't require more than 10 minutes of thought. I kinda like the sound of that :)
One final note, I know I've had a good rant about blogging and while what I've said above is all true, I have to shoutout the positives too. So quickly, before this post becomes painfully long (and kudos if you've stayed with me this far - you've got a far better attention span than I have), I must tell you that blogging has opened up a whole new world of opportunities for me. I've met awesome people, been offered awesome experiences, done awesome collaborations and even got job proposals from it. Most importantly, I've challenged myself in a way I didn't know I could be challenged and I've grown. So not all bad then.
However, I'd love to hear your experiences of bad blogging too. I think it's fun to share the realities of it, too many blogs out there are so perky - let's get some of the dirty details out haha. No but seriously, it's a hard job. A rewarding one yes, but a difficult one so go on, have a little rant. What are some of your BAD BLOGGING habits? Feels so good to share, promise ;) xo